Dear Mom && Dad,

Thank you. 

An eight letter, English phrase that falls short of eighteen years of gratitude I mean to express. Without either of you, I sincerely believe I wouldn’t be here, living in the jungle of Costa Rica, with the sole purpose of helping others find joy in God. My deepest dream and satisfaction so far in this lifetime.  

So here’s 9 things I want to never forget and hope you don’t either:

1. I vaguely remember introducing the idea of the World Race to you for the first time. It was a dream that I have kept close for years now. But I know the idea of needing $16,000 for your dear child to travel across the world with a group of strangers probably was a hard one to swallow. However, you took the time to understand the passion and commitment in my soul for such a God-created dream. Thank you for your yes. A “yes” that said, “I support you and walk with you and will love you through this always, but you’re on your own to make it happen.” You sweetly handed over the opportunity to fail, take responsibility, and work hard, but simultaneously the opportunity to have God show up in my life. And He did. I hope you saw Him there too.

2. I will never forget the nights I know you stayed half awake until you heard the garage closing at 2am. I always knew to stop by your bedroom door on my way upstairs to give you a tight squeeze. You always slept better after that. Thank you for wanting to hand over enough trust to ensure my independence as I grew up. You didn’t owe me the kind of freedom that caused you to stay half awake on the nights I know both of you had to get up early the next day. That was a gift that I still hold close. Reminds me of the way our Heavenly Father is constantly fighting to hand us gifts we never deserved. 

3. Thank you for making mistakes. Because grace is incapable of fostering in an environment of perfection; those who cannot accept their failures cannot accept or give grace either. Your search to recognise the ways in which you both fall short is a search for God to meet you there. I see you willingly walk through your own human brokenness in a chance to have a greater capacity to love.  

4. You have always kept your door open for a listening ear. Even after all the times I didn’t take it. You understood how I worked. You knew my need for the constant reminder that vulnerability means freedom. Don’t worry, God’s not given up on teaching me that lesson.

5. Dad, You have taught me how to get things done. Procrastination is close to failure and I still did it no matter how often I learned that lesson. You loved me so well by making me do the little, important things I would have waited the very last minute to do. You care about the small details of everything. And almost always do extra.  

6. Mama, you cry at practically every movie even when it’s not sad at all. But you’ve showed me that emotions are healthy. The tears down your cheeks so often gave me permission to let the tears roll down mine. 

7. You made church a routine almost every Sunday even when I was too young and too scared to make friends myself. For year you let me sit with you in “big” church even when I didn’t fully understand the message. Thank you for encouraging me to go to youth group when I made my first genuine friend in church (aka Lili). I think I met God for real in that community my freshman year of high school. 

8. Thank you for all the nights you rallied us around the dinner table. Most days it was the only place we were altogether. I am learning here that the table is a place of unity and goodness and overflow. It’s where Jesus invites us into more. And it’s where our family found more of each other even on the days we had no desire to.  

9. And I never want to forget how you excitedly drove me to the airport at 4am and 11pm because what I had been talking about for years had finally arrived; the dream you helped me fight for through disappointment, fear, and a world pandemic became a reality. 

I’m learning a lot about sacrifice here. The more I lose, the more I recognise all you given up for me. And the more I try to fathom what Jesus gave up for us all. 

Thank you for doing hard things every time they weren’t easy. Jesus said, “My command is this: love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends,” (John 15:12-13). Sometimes laying your life down for someone doesn’t mean taking a bullet for them. Sometimes it means doing what’s best for another in a moment even if it makes you look like a failure. It’s laying down your pride, your rights, and your comfort for the profit of someone else. A type of love that I not only get to receive from God, but from my own parents. What an honor. 

Squeeze you tight in June <33

Sending love, your daughter, 

Kenzi Grace